My husband is a crack head

Ok we were in the bathroom smoking and he picks up the instructions thingy for my tampons and starts reading! lmao What a dork!!
He was picking on my earlier and I told him that when he gets home from work in the morning and passes out he's going to wake up w/ something strange insterted into his rectum. heeh
So I picked up this tube of bath confetti that one of the mommas got me for christmas and told him thats what he was going to get. Lmao...so then we go off on this whole tangent about farting confetti and a SURPRISE party. That would be one hell of a surprise eh? We're crack heads, I swear!

Paranoia

Akira was jumping and having a ball in her jumperoo earlier tonight and I was LOVING it!
She hasnt really seemed to like her jumperoo much yet but tonight she was just jumping up a storm! I really wish I could capture the look on her face when she's jumping bc it is just soo darn adorable!! She gets all into it!! But, alas, it blurs.

Paranoia Paranoia everyones out to get me....
I think I have driven myself even deeper into my insanity...I'm sitting here alone, its after 4 am...and I am HEARING SHIT!!! I'm used to the sounds of the rats and what not, but seriously, I feel like there is some imminent danger near by and I dont get why! We live in the country, we do have neighbors, I personally know all 3 of them very very well and the woman who lives closest to us happens to be my cousin (she's in her late 70's now). I just have this horrible feeling and I dont know why!!! I want to leave the front door locked but I know that I have the house key bc Jeremy didnt take his keys w/ him when he went out on the rig tonight. POO!! And I know I more than likely won't wake up when he gets home around 8 am unless he tries to sneak in and be quiet, he knows if he just bangs around like normal it won't phase me.

I guess I'm just a freak or something!! We live right on a highway that there is a decent amount of traffic on for the area, although the only things I've personally heard go by in the past couple hours is semi's and truck drivers don't bother me. Its the strangers in cars that aren't from here that bother me.

Ok I should probably go to bed...maybe I'll load the 30-06 and put it under my side of the bed, make me feel better! lol G'night world!!

What a miracle

Do you ever just gaze into the faces of your children? You should. Its so amazing to just watch them and think about what a miracle they are. I was just sitting around and staring into Akira's face and she would just look up at me and grin ever so slightly, its so amazing. I love my children more than anything. I could never imagine that I could love anyone as much as I love my girls, they are such miracles and so amazing.

I just can't get over how they came from ME and Jeremy, its amazing. WE made the girls, they are ours and ours alone. Its such a miracle...really it is, and then think about how small your children were when they were born. When we went to see our friends and their new baby boy last Saturday, he's an 8lb baby btw, I was amazed at how little he seemed and my girls were 5lbs each!! I just can't get over how big they are!!

They had their 4 month appointment Monday. Alexa weighs 14.8 lbs and Akira weighs 12.12lbs both are 24 1/2 inches long. Dr. Kotrakona said they are doing GREAT! And she complimented me on how good I am with them. She said that I seem so natural w/ them like I've always had children. She was amazed that the girls are my first babies. It made me feel so wonderful that she said that because I worry all the time that I'm not good enough of a mother to them. I'm afraid I leave them in their high chairs too much, that I don't hold them enough....that they don't feel loved or know what love is.

I just worry too much I think. I remember my OB, Dr. Gates made fun of me bc I was afraid to get my IUD bc I was scared it would hurt and he said this: "You are scared to get it? You, the one who carried TWINS like it was NOTHING!! And mothers them easier than most do one baby?! You are scared to get an IUD?"

Maybe I am a good mother...Maybe I just worry entirely too much...bah
Ok, I'll probably write more later, I'll be up most of the night ;)

Baby Food, not just for babies!!

I've found that recently I have become rather addicted to Bananna baby foods....even when they have strawberry and pears in it too!! They're so damn good!! They need to make them for adults!

Jeremy went to work tonight. He's filling in for Bj on the rig. I worry so much when he's working on the rig, especially when its so cold like it is. I worry that I'm going to get a phone call...that he's been hurt. I know it can happen, but I keep trying to tell myself that its NOT going to happen.

I entered the girls in a photo contest, so if anyone happens to actually read this, PLEASE go vote for my girls!

here's the link for the monthly contest:
http://www.lookhowcuteiam.com/ratemepublic/index.php?id=1484
and here's the link for the weekly contest:
http://www.lookhowcuteiam.com/ratemepublic/index.php?id=1483

I would REALLY appreciate it y'all!!!
Thanks in advance!
Oh, just as a side note, it'll let you vote over and over so keep on voting!

Combobulation

Have you ever wondered why the word Discombobulation exsists?
Can a person actually BE combobulated? Lets see, now what is the exact definition of discombobulation...

dis·com·bob·u·late /ˌdɪskəmˈbɒbyəˌleɪt/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[dis-kuhm-bob-yuh-leyt]

–verb (used with object), -lat·ed, -lat·ing.

to confuse or disconcert; upset; frustrate: The speaker was completely discombobulated by the hecklers.

dis·com·bob·u·la·tion, noun

dis·com·bob·u·late (dĭs'kəm-bŏb'yə-lāt') tr.v. dis·com·bob·u·lat·ed, dis·com·bob·u·lat·ing, dis·com·bob·u·lates To throw into a state of confusion. See Synonyms at confuse.

discombobulation

noun

a feeling of embarrassment that leaves you confused [syn: confusion]

Ok, now that said then how would a person be combobulated?? unconfused?? Maybe to throw out of a state of confusion? I don't know, I don't get it at all....